Arachnaphobia

I received an email from a teacher requesting me to talk to a fifth grade student of his that was refusing to use the school bathroom. (Not exactly a nursing issue one may argue, but I took it anyway. The teacher was male, the student female; I can't blame him for sending her to me.) A timid little girl came into my office, and looked petrified as I asked her to shut the door behind her for privacy. I assured her everything was okay and told her I just wanted to talk to her real quick:
Me: So...Your teacher mentioned you aren't using the bathroom here at school and I just want to find out why. Is everything okay?
Girl: Yes...
Me: So no one is teasing you or anything, there's not another student doing something that makes you not want to use the bathroom?
Girl [laughing]: No, no, it's not that.
Me: I've never used the bathrooms here, but if they're anything like where I went to school, I bet they're gross. Are they gross?
Girl [laughing]: Yes! They are so gross!

It turned out that what was gross about them to her was that she saw a spider in one once, and, in her words, she's "terrified" of spiders. Poor thing. I told her I'd talk with the janitor, and a secretary came up with a plan for her to get a buddy to scope the bathroom out for spiders before she uses it.

It's a shame this isn't a performance-based gig, because I think I am way better at this thing than some of the other ladies I work with. (I'm thinking of one in particular who turns her desk so that kids cannot walk up behind her or next to her, they can only approach her head on.) Oh well...I'll just give myself a pat on the back for this one.