Best. Hug. Ever.

Shoe Girl has new shoes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

More later, please excuse me while I bask in the glory of my victory.

:) (x a million!)

Friday "Recap"

Well, despite there being no emergencies* these past two weeks, I wouldn't say this school year has been off to a great start. Out of approximately 15-20 emergency care plans I mailed home after failing to reach parents after multiple phone call tries, zero have been returned. It's a bit unsettling to have things like "peanut allergy/epipen" written on an emergency card and then have no epipen, no other paperwork, and your phone calls seem to be getting lost in outer space. My new school, in a world away of a different neighborhood than my two others, was supposed to be an upgrade with more caring adult parents, and less strung out unidentifiable relatives. Instead I have one diabetic for whom I STILL don't have current orders, and another one breathing down my neck about my care who is certifiable crazy. (She refers to the child as her "daughter's son" even though it's her name as the mother on the birth certificate, and when I asked the kid who he lives with he said his mom.) On top of it all, the principal at my middle school is hounding me to get all the TDap records in and we still have 30+ kids to chase down.

 

The saving grace this week: starting color vision testing on the kindergarten boys. It sounds twisted, but finding the color blind kids is thrilling. It's satisfying to think everyone will know this about the kid sooner rather than later, and delivering the actual test is a joy itself: I sit in the back of the class in tiny chairs I fear breaking, listening to ABC songs, and I get to meet all the kindergarten kids - they're a blast, some of them.

 

Let's hope the beginning of this year isn't an indication of what the rest of the year might be like.

 

 

*Just barely. I answered a call from my trusty health clerk on Tuesday who asked me to get to where she was in a hurry: my old elementary school, site of four 9-1-1 calls, and one of the greatest concentration of weirdos in town. I found one of my old kids in the middle of a bad asthma attack, sitting with a cracked out uncle who came without medication upon getting word of the attack, because mom is in Las Vegas doing who knows what. It was my call: ER? Nope, I dug out her old medication in the cupboard, which technically isn't allowed because new paperwork hadn't been signed for the school year. Rules are meant to be broken, and I'm not sure what kind of person I'd be if I withheld albuterol in the face of a wheezing child on account of her inept mother being too irresponsible to do the right paperwork. Disaster averted, but seriously, some people should not be parents...or in the case of the cracked out uncle who arrived medication-less and suggested we give her a peppermint, they shouldn't be guardians either.

Really?

It took three phone calls and three days to find someone who agreed that, after an accidental needlestick, I should probably go get a blood test. Am I the only one who believes in bloodborne pathogens?

A new one

There's a little girl, now in second grade, that was a frequent flier to my office last year. She made up things ranging from accidents she didn't have to saying her dad hit her and she's in pain (do not fear, we take all such reports seriously and did file a CPS on that one). For such a tiny little girl, she's loaded with mental health issues, and after almost a full school year of denial, the parents are finally getting her therapy.

Still, I wasn't surprised today when she asked to see me. The reason, however, was one I haven't heard before: the "summer diarrhea virus."

Hey kid, summer's over.

Never recap a needle.

If you're a nurse, or do any work with needles, you know where this post is headed...

Not fair

I don't understand how teachers can complain I didn't get the student health alert list to them soon enough when they send kids complaining of stomachaches stemming from anxiety to my office. Parents won't pick them up and the kids are too hysterical for me to bring back to class, much less talk to them or get anything else done while they're squealing. I'm thinking I'll be filing for worker's comp for hearing loss after this week.

Actually written on an emergency card:

Occupation: Domestic Goddess.

Also, parent of Mr. High Maintenance (we'll call her Mrs. High Maintenance) came looking for me at lunch, just as the office staff and I were saying some not so nice things about her. That was lovely. It was about as lovely as the lengthy lecture I got on taking care of Mr. HM.

Now I see why, when I was hired two weeks into the school year last year, everyone said what a relief that was for me. These first three days have been nothing but craziness, and my sanity was only barely saved today when "Epilepsy Mom" returned a phone call I'd made in hopes of getting updated information on her daughter and left a message about five minutes long thanking me over and over for making the effort to get in touch with her. (My goodness, how things have changed since our first encounter.)