The cat's out of the bag

The secretaries at Diabetic Land had agreed that Spitfire shouldn't know of my pregnancy until she needed to. She's had a rough home life, plenty of abandonment issues, and none of us wanted her to know I'd be leaving her early this year...or so I'd thought. One secretary just couldn't keep the secret anymore, and told Spitfire today to see if she noticed anything different on me. When she returned after lunch, Spitfire began the interrogation: did you cut your hair? New shoes? New sweater? New nose? Eventually, she said, "You're having a baby."

I responded yes so calmly that she didn't believe me, and continued on with her guessing until I stopped her and told her that I was telling the truth; I'm pregnant. She didn't hide the shock on her face, wouldn't even look me in the eye for some time. I showed her the ultrasound picture and told her that it was mine; she asked if the baby had a daddy. She wanted to see a picture of my husband, and briefly giggled when she saw he has a beard before bringing us back to the subject at hand.

"Who's going to be my nurse? I am so disappointed in you. I can't believe this. I am so disappointed in you. I can't believe this. Can you give birth here in this office? I need a nurse, I can't do this by myself. I'm so disappointed in you."

I tried to reassure her, telling her the baby is still a long ways off, and promised I will be her nurse as long as possible. It did no good. In between her repeated statements of how disappointed in me she is, she asked, "Could you put the baby up for adoption so you could still be my nurse?"

She left looking dejected and continuing to repeat her disappointment in me as she left my office. The timing couldn't have been worse, either: a Friday afternoon when next week are minimum days so I won't see her unless she happens to stay for lunch (which she never does), followed by Thanksgiving break. It'll be 2 1/2 weeks before I see her again.

Ugh.

(I informed the secretary who had spilled the beans that she didn't take it well, and that was precisely the reason I'd been trying to postpone telling her. I can only hope she felt some guilt.)